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Marrying for luck. Or not.

9/9/2012

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Scenario #1
What?! Really? You can't be serious. Oh, you are. Great. So I was supposed to leave by myself, to my wedding, and wait for all of my bridesmaids to meet me later, after they get their hair done by the SAME HAIR DRESSER. All of them. By the SAME HAIRDRESSER. I was so mad. All of the beautician's called in that day but one...so she had to do all of their hair by herself. Can you imagine how long that takes? So I said goodbye to them, got in my car, and left. By myself. To meet my future husband, who was late himself, so that tells you the kind of luck I had that day. Why was he late, you ask? He was getting his hair done. Ironic. Anyway, I expected my girls to be late, but I did not expect them to miss the wedding pictures. Or Dan and I walking out for the first time as husband & wife. Or the beginning of the reception, too. Dude. I think I could've done all of their hair in an hour. And it would've been $650 cheaper, too. Dan paid. Here's a big fat bill, sweetie. Aren't you glad you married me? Oh, by the way, you're marrying my luck, too.

Scenario #2
Planning. That’s what I had been doing for weeks and weeks. I was taking Dan to a surprise trip to California when we were dating, and I had set back a lot of money and time to get everything perfect. He picked me up around 8:30 pm that night, and we were excited. We had munchies packed, good music, a romantic mood, and a virus. Yep. A virus. Dan was sick. But we decided to go anyway, and headed out. We drove and drove, and right around Southern California is when he really started to feel horrible.  And that’s when we got stuck in a blizzard (In February. In SOUTHERN California.  Am I the only one stumped by this??) Anyway, we sat on the side of the road, freeeeeeezing. By this time, Dan was shaking and feeling really sick, and we-were-stuck. But we had to do something for him, so we walked to a nearby gas station where people seemed to be getting supplies. All they had was some kind of Benadryl. So, we bought it. I gotta tell you, I was not happy about this, because it meant I would have to drive us out of the blizzard, and I don’t do blizzards. I can’t even do a traffic jam. But, I agreed to drive when that time came, and all seemed well. Did I mention above that we have bad luck…?

We were stuck on the side of the road for hours & hours, so when it came time to drive, Dan was no longer sleepy from the medicine. He drove a bit, and I drove the rest. When we got to our destination it was about 5:45 am, and we were starving, so we ate. Then we thought we’d try to get into our hotel room a few hours early since it was so vacant, so Dan could rest (by this time he was death on feet). The receptionist not-so-politely told us no. I was ready to bite her head off but Dan didn’t want a scene. Honestly, he was SO mad at me for being so upset with the lady, that I think he secretly wanted to dump me. Right there. In front of our Hotel. So we went to Sea World instead, myself and Mr. Walking Dead. Now I must add that I am editing the majority of horrifying things that went on during this trip. This is just one bad luck moment. Anyway, eventually we were able to later get into our hotel room, where I stayed mad at him for getting a separate room. Why a separate room? Because he is a gentleman. And it was from those separate rooms that we wanted to kill each other for a good portion of the trip. Obviously though, he didn't dump me. With our luck put together, he probably should have. 
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Scenario #3
It's not often Dan gets depressed. But there was once, last year. He was trying so hard to work the Real Estate, so we could start a new life, a new profession...and it's something we love to do. So, he decided he would take two straight weeks off of work, and do nothing but real estate. Literally NOTHING. He had built up the vacation hours for 10 years, to spend them on something life changing and important. So here it was. He wanted to use them on this. He worked it out so perfectly..the clients...the hours...everything was set up. We even had a high-roller client coming down from California during those two weeks specifically so Dan could help him. Dan was so excited. So he made plans, and boy, was my husband non existent to us. He was in and out, putting in contracts, doing buys & sells, signing leases, seriously the best real estate agent I'd ever seen. When the two weeks were up, he sat back  and felt really, really good about the hours..obviously well spent. But let me tell you something about Dan and I. We have a little problem. It's called Bad Luck. Have you read the above posts? Exactly. So what happened? Deal after deal fell through. And I'm not talking one or two or three deals. I'm talking TEN deals or more, one which included a million dollar buyer. Yeah. Still haven't healed from that one. Anyway, by the time Monday rolled around to go back to work, Dan was so sad, he didn't want to eat, or sleep, or answer his phone :(. I tell ya, it was so sad for him that when I asked him some of the worst bad luck moments we've had, he immediately brought up his "two weeks vacation time" adventure. "Down the drain", he says to me, still with a hint of regret in his voice.
You see, I get mad about my wedding not going perfect, or the perfect vacation going down hill. But not Dan. He's logical. Smart. Motivated. He regrets things he's done or not been able to do, or dreams crushed. While I, selfishly, regret the bad hair-cut I got last week. Goes to show you who has more soul. 
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Our bad luck. It's in the stars, I tell you. Every time we go out of town, every time we make plans. And I am not feeling sorry for us, believe me. I actually think it's funny. My mother even admitted to me recently that horrible things happen to us. Small things to large things. And don't even bring up our Honeymoon. That probably ranks #1 on our scenario list. But you know what? I didn't marry Dan for his luck. And he didn't marry me for mine. I married him for his smile, laughter, honesty, integrity, sincerity.... he married me for completely different reasons.

But that's a whole other post :) 
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Not even my anxiety.....

9/8/2012

2 Comments

 
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I had a very scary moment this afternoon. I was on the computer and Rowen was about 6 feet behind me, playing. I had a feeling to go check him, so I walked over to him, picked him up, and his mouth was open and he was gagging. My fingers immediately dove into his mouth to find he had one of Emma's small toy parts LODGED in his mouth. He could not open nor close his mouth anymore, because it was lodged vertically. I finally got a good grasp on it and pulled it out, and he vomited, and I comforted him. As he cried I held him, and seconds later he was fine and smiling. It bothered me all day, and I was extremely watchful after that...and of course COMPLETELY freaked out.  Ah, the joys of a freaked out mother. Yep. Thank you, Anxiety. Nice to see you again.  

But it wasn't until tonight that it really hit me. If it had been a few more seconds, we could possibly be sitting in a hospital, or surrounded by friends and family in quick embraces as they cry and tell me how sorry they are for our loss. Now, it may sound over the top. I may be exaggerating slightly at "what could have happened". But that's what I do. Sometimes I lay in bed and think of all of the horrible things that can happen and I practically have a panic attack. Have you ever done that? Yeah, it's a bummer.  Tonight I had to say a prayer to ease my mind and think of happy thoughts. It was almost overwhelming, the thought.   

 So there I was tonight, holding this baby boy in my arms, and wondering what I must've done to please the Lord enough for him to tap me on my shoulder today and remind me to check Rowen. It was kind of a spiritual, deep moment for me. Different things going through my head, looking at things in a different light. I am sure it won't be the last time I have that little thought or inspiration pushing me to check my children when I've been not so smart.  But if something did happen, if tragedy did strike, and for some reason our hearts were left broken, I cannot ever say we weren't blessed. We will have had wonderful, amazing lives with these kids. 

And not even my anxiety can take that away.


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2 Comments

    Rebbecca Lynn Rodgers

    I am a writer, a mother, a wife,  and a daughter of God.  I hope what you find here inspires you and helps you.
    If you would like to contact me, please feel free to do so!


    Email: danandbekka@gmail.com 
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